Glee: 04×14: To Hookup or Not To Hookup

In this week’s episode entitled ‘I Do’ we see two brides, 5 couples getting hotel rooms and only 4 end up doing the deed. Here’s how it went down:

Finchel/ Brochel

The episode begins with Rachel meeting Finn at the Lima Bean. He’s all distraught about the Emma kiss and Rachel makes him calm down, for a minute at least.

Unsurprisingly, Rachel is the one who catches the bride’s bouquet at the reception. Finn tells her he knows that she’s still in love with him and that he really doesn’t care who she’s shacked up with now because he knows that they’re endgame. Was this the writers reassuring the fandom that Finchel will be together in the end so they should calm their tits? I think so.

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This heartfelt conversation prompts the two to get a room at the hotel and have sex. Rachel sneaks out in the middle of the night and returns home to a Valentines day decorated apartment courtesy of Brody. He immediately senses that something’s wrong when they kiss and asks her if she kissed anyone else. Rachel denies doing anything with Finn, and Brody denies doing anything in her absence (which we see he actually does). Oh you pretty little liars.

Wemma/ Femma

Finn goes to see a very stressed out Emma about the seating chart for her wedding. Emma is so flustered she says “All you glee kids have dated so incestuously I can’t even remember who can stand who anymore”. Girl preach! Finn still feeling guilty about the kiss brings it up again and Emma simply tells him to get over it. If the bride ain’t stressing why are you Finn?


Will is back and excited about the wedding and to be back with Emma and the glee club.

At the wedding we see Emma still freaking out and Sue dressed in an identical wedding gown to Emma’s. Emma decides she can’t do it and runs away. Sue walks down the aisle shockingly (but not shocking me) and tells Will about his bride to be’s departure. Cue the violins and get the tissues.



Emma tells Artie about her niece Betty, who she’s setting him up with at the wedding. At the wedding. Artie finds Betty and introduces himself to her. She immediately insults Artie telling him he’s not her type and that he should just roll away.

Later on, Artie rolls back to Betty admitting yes she is quite bitchy but he likes it and asks her to dance. She agrees and the two seem to have a good time on the dance floor. Later on, they get a room together and have what Betty says to be “the best (sex) she ever had and she’s had a lot”. Artie toots his own horn and agrees.


Betty goes to Mckinley to see Artie and apologizes for her bitchiness and blames it on her being nervous. He tells her it’s alright and asks her for her digits because he’s taking her out this weekend. Yes! Artie got the moves like Jagger. Haha.

Jarley/ Ryley

Marley decides to give Jake an early Valentines Day present so that he can wear it to the wedding. Jake has no real idea what to get Marley, and Ryder comes to his rescue. Ryder suggests that Jake shouldn’t do Valentines Day but make it Valentines week. Jake starts off the week by invading Marley’s class dressed in a red suit with the glee boys backing him up and sing her a duet. How sweet, but can anyone just interrupt a class and bust out in song though?

Valentines week continues with Jarley right up to the wedding. Jake tells Ryder that he got them a room and really hopes he gets laid. Ryder tells him that Marley isn’t ready yet, but Jake disagrees and tells him that he’s in love with her and she’s opening up to him, so it’s worth a try.


Unfortunately for Jake, Marley doesn’t give up her golden ticket and she apologizes for it. He says it’s fine but can they at least go back downstairs and get at least one last dance. It’s cool that Jake wasn’t too pressed about it, but we’ll see how it plays out later.

Throughout the whole of Valentines week, while helping Jake, it was obvious that Ryder is still in love with Marley, and all the gift ideas he’s given Jake were ones he wanted to give/do for Marley himself. Marley clocks on and thanks Ryder for helping Jake and wishes him all the best with finding a girlfriend for him to do all these amazing things for. Ryder admits that he did it for her and kisses her, to which she runs off. Awww, so cute.


Santana and Quinn end up going to the wedding together. Quinn finally admits that she does let men define her and she’s so sick of them now, while Santana complains about seeing all the couples together. Quinn compliments Santana telling her she’s killing that dress and Santana agrees even noting that the reason they get along so well is because they are from “the same two ends of the bitch spectrum”. Oh yes you are Santana, yes you are.


The two continue the night together slow dancing on the dance floor with Quinn even commenting that she’s never slow danced with a girl before. They end up getting a hotel room together and spending the night. Quinn admits that she’s always wondered what it was like being with a girl and admits that it will probably just be a one time thing. Santana reassures her that she’s not going to be stalking her and maybe they should make it a two time thing. Yesss Santana, get it in! Quinntana for the win!


Klaine/ Tlaine

The first scene we seen of Kurt and Blaine is the two having a hot, steamy make out session in the back of a car. Mercedes breaks them up as the wedding is about to start and tells them that she needs her gays on her arms and that “this outfit needs an audience”.


During the reception, a very jealous Tina decides to confront Kurt about the way he’s been treating Blaine. Kurt shuts her down right there and then by calling her a creepy hag and that she needs to stop this. About time someone read Tina down to size and put her in her place.

Later on Kurt & Blaine get a hotel room and do their thing *wink wink*. After all is done, Blaine tells him that they have to be together, and that this is a sign that they were together for Christmas and are now together for Valentines day. Kurt dismisses it and says he’s not sure and leaves the room.


They later meet at Mckinley and discuss with Tina that they’re going to help her find a boyfriend and that they’re not upset with her. Pssht Kurt you were so upset, you’re just cool now cause Blaine didn’t stray.

The episode ends with Rachel checking her diary in the middle of the night and then taking a pregnancy test. Girl don’t you know you should wrap it up if you’re gonna sleep around?


  • How funny was it when Quinn asked Santana if she wanted her to slap her again?
  • Where was little miss Kitty, Unique, Sugar & Joe Hart? I’d have thought Joe would officiate the ceremony.
  • Isn’t Ryder’s love for Marley so sweet, he tried his best to resist her.
  • It was really good seeing the old gang back together again, Mike, Puck and especially Quinn & Mercedes.
  • I don’t even feel sorry for Rachel in the least about this pregnancy scare.
  • I supported every single one of those hook ups! Get it in!
  • It was good to see Santana not moping around and being bitter about Brittany and Sam.
  • Why do we have to wait 3 weeks for a new episode? 😦

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2 thoughts on “Glee: 04×14: To Hookup or Not To Hookup

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